Friends,
The last blog I wrote was about the gift of recognizing my role as a courageous educator. The opportunity to share my teaching experience as a balancing act between fear and joy was empowering. It allowed me to lean more fully into joy. Upon my return to school, Our community had even organized a cerebral palsy awareness day alongside our annual bingo night. Everyone wore green and I shared how special it had been to teach. The day was more special because I had just shared my story as a disabled educator with others because I had felt a sense of belonging in our school family. I was acknowledged. I was grateful. I had inspired others.
In the weeks that followed celebration and joy I sincerely struggled. It seemed impossible to reach students. It became more challenging to manage negative behavior. As quickly as I had embraced joy I now felt inadequate. I was defeated. I was overwhelmed. I had failed. As we finished the school year, I was present but definitely felt less hopeful. Summer can be a difficult season because my heart is most full when I’m in my classroom. I’m not the perfect teacher but I’m passionate about helping students. There is so much gratitude for my school community. I felt a sense of betrayal as I headed into summer looking forward to the break. More importantly, in my fear I had stopped so freely expressing my joy to colleagues and friends. I hadn’t written an uplifting blog. The light that I strived to share with others had disappeared.
I’m a full week into summer vacation. I love to be busy but haven’t planned much. This week I tuned into one of my favorite television shows — Sunday Morning. It’s a combination of news and enriching stories. This week’s program featured a segment on a quadriplegic mom who raises twins. The story captivated my attention as a disabled woman and as part of multiples. For me, there’s always been so much hope in accomplishing tasks that others consider ordinary. At the end of the segment this mom was clear : She didn’t want to be inspiring. Each disabled person has an individual perspective about the idea of an “Inspiring life” Here’s mine.
I have always considered it a responsibility to be a beacon of hope. My call to teaching helps all people acknowledge that disabled children will become adults. Everyone deserves to live a fulfilling life. It helps students who cope with differences or disabilities see that they can be productive and professional leaders. It helps communities that embrace disabled professionals be advocates for awareness in the most practical way — Let us work! This isn’t to say, that every disabled person is able (or qualified ) to work in every industry. The point is that rejection often comes because of disability and that shouldn't happen. It helps promote acceptance. I chose teaching because I have a set of skills and heart for students. I chose teaching because it gives me the opportunity to inspire.
It can be difficult to be a disabled professional because there’s a delicate balance between gratitude and value. I am grateful for the space to share my abilities but I also know that my contributions help make our community stronger. As I grow professionally and personally, I’m working through the idea that being discouraged doesn't make me any less of an impactful educator. There’s so much resilience in being willing to keep trying when we feel like we have failed. I was defeated. I was overwhelmed. I kept teaching. Those feelings have helped me recognize teaching ( and life ) as a growing process. It's always important to celebrate growth even on the most difficult of days.
Keep on…. I hope you’re inspired!
Julie
