Overcoming Impossible!

Right now life feels impossible! I’m halfway between hope and hopeless.   It’s tough to be stuck between knowing that life’s not fair and wishing it were  because  I consider it my responsibility to give others hope.   For the past few weeks, I’ve been thinking about a story that is a source of borrowed strength.

It was our last semester of Graduate School.  The class before we would become student teachers.  Our class was a close-knit group of no more than fifteen.  On our first day a fellow classmate made his way into class with a wheelchair.   As a person with cerebral palsy I immediately noticed his distinct difference.  This is slightly embarrassing to   admit because I absolutely hate when people notice my awkward gait before they notice me.   At the same time as a teacher with cerebral palsy   who copes with (and worries) about my physical needs in the classroom I was deeply inspired. This classmate had also made the decision to teach despite this obstacle.  So, I like to think about noticing his differences as a point of connection.    This is to say, I   know that sometimes, it can be difficult to explain your differences to the community.  Furthermore,  the task can be even more challenging to confront as a teacher because teens can be exceptionally rude.  I thought long and hard before writing him a note.  In short,  the note told him that I was a teacher with cerebral palsy and would support him  on his teaching journey in anyway I could. 

One day after class we started talking about how our classroom experiences were going.  It turned out that he too had cerebral palsy!  So out of curiosity I asked, “How do your students handle it? What do you tell them?”   How do you cope with getting exceptionally rude comments or stares at common places like the grocery store?"   I was excited to hear his story.  He could offer me advice and perspective that I might not have considered.  His response was simple and impactful all the same: “Honestly, the kids are cool with it. I grew up in  a not so good part of Charlotte. So, no one really asks, they just assume it’s something else--- like I got shot.”  I was stunned.   He was so calm and collected over it. He even laughed a little bit.   

His story is a solid reminder that cerebral palsy is a different experience for every person who copes with it.   In a time when our city seems to be challenged by rising crime  I can’t help but, think that people might be making greater assumptions about this young man’s story.  Nonetheless, he seems to approach these assumptions with such grace.  

 Life’s not fair; it just is what it is.    We don’t get to decide what people will think about us.  We only get to decide to help each other through the challenges that seem impossible!  There’s so much strength in the ability to live as our best selves even when we feel like the odds are stacked against us.

Building bridges together, 

 Teacher Julie 

A Commitment to Care : Freezing Together!

This has to be the coldest week of the winter season. Nighttime lows are nearly in the single digits causing several schools to operate on delayed schedules. There’s even snow along the coast of Charleston S.C. ----  that never happens!  Friends, it’s freezing! In the midst of the freeze, there’s a story on my heart. I hesitate to share because I don’t serve others so that everyone knows. The story is a reminder of how we care.

Right before Christmas break I had the opportunity to join a group of students at a local soup kitchen.  This was significant for two reasons.  First, I had never been to a soup kitchen.  Second, I had never been asked to lead a fieldtrip. Nonetheless, I jumped at the chance.  After all, this was an opportunity that combined my love for teaching and service.  I was all in!   It was an unforgettable experience. 

As I cleaned tables with students the coordinator of our service told a student,  “You should clean like that lady over there…. Use some elbow grease”.  Truthfully, I don’t think she realized that I was a teacher but, I smiled and the students seemed to work just the slightest bit harder.    The soup kitchen was almost closed. As I glanced over I noticed two young boys with an adult in line.   Then as I moved to clean my last table, a little girl sat in her coat finishing the last of her meal.  The teacher in me was perplexed. Why weren’t   these children in a classroom at this time of day?  I wondered if I should say hello to the young girl.  I decided against it thinking: she might be afraid of an unfamiliar lady not to mention; I was unsure how the woman who had brought her might react to my greeting.    So, I finished my work and gathered my students.  

As a perspective teacher, I have researched the startling statistic a dozen times; there are 5,000 homeless students in our school system---- that number is still accurate. Moreover, I have volunteered at schools where food goes home with students each Friday. School staff does everything they can to make sure students eat while not at school.  Sometimes, as I tutored students I wondered if they’d eat again before returning to school the next morning.  It’s a sad reality for students in our city.   It’s fair to say, I know kids are hungry, but it felt strikingly different to see that hunger in a soup kitchen.  School is a safe space, a heated space where students eat together. Children should be surrounded by adults who should make every effort to T.E. L.L (Teach, Encourage, Listen, & Love) them they matter.    The T.E.L.L message has impacted my life significantly as a teacher and a student.   I wondered why those students weren’t in the school building but, that is less because they might be missing a reading or writing lesson and more because there are few moments --- if any in a soup kitchen to be encouraged, loved, listened to, and taught that you matter.    Let’s be honest, I just said, I was nervous about saying hello.  So, if I was afraid surely, all the emotional comfort of who these children long to be is lost as each of them faces the need to survive ---- to be physically nourished. It leaves me more grateful for those who  remind me that I'm valuable! 

There are days on this journey when my luck seems low and I’m discouraged. Then there’s an unexpected opportunity to fulfill a hunger to make the world a better place.   A time  and space for me  to understand the true meaning of being full. It was extraordinary! At the soup kitchen my weakness don’t seem to matter too much. I clean tables just as well as anyone else.  At the end of the day, we all have the ability to care for one other!  An opportunity to be a difference maker is never wasted.   Serving one another is a reflection of the heart that keeps us emotionally nourished.  In the bitter cold, I’m thinking about nourishment in new light. I’m nourished physically so, it’s my responsibility to give away emotional nourishment whenever I can. Life should be less about what we have and more about what can give--- even if the only thing we can offer is a heart full of care and  kindness!

This weekend challenge yourself to “freeze” with someone. Share a cup of coffee or a meal. Ask them how they are and be intentional about listening. Try not to be afraid of a  less than happy response.   Remind them specifically how they impact your life!   Conversation, community, and care are some of the best way to warm our hearts!

Stay Warm!

Julie