Remembering All I AM!

Friends,

It’s almost Thanksgiving break.  This means we are about half way through the second quarter.  I’m excited that I am finding rhythm to my days.  I’ve also discovered that teaching is an emotional roller coaster.  I chose to teach because I wanted to celebrate life and learning with students the way my teachers celebrated it with me.  This is challenging work.  If I’m not careful, I find myself dwelling on my shortcomings.   I’ve been assured this happens to all professionals, but I think it’s more common in the teaching profession.    Here is a list of things I during the school day or week that help me see all that I am instead of all that I’m not.

Sticky Notes

At least once a week I write a sticky note of affirmation to someone in our school. I also give students the opportunity to do this….  Here’s the thing, if I need to uplifted odds are others do too.  I’ve always felt a need to give others hope. Sticky notes are intentional way to do this Above all else; I want to be known for being a kind encourager!

Remembering & Celebrating Teachers 

At least once a day, I share an anecdote or a quote from a former teacher or a mentor that has inspired me!  This just happens naturally--- that’s part of the reason this is so special to me! My hope is that demonstrates my passion for my subject and teaching.  If I’m teaching on the constitution why not, tell them about my study of a third world country during university when I too understood just how critical living in America is….   Sharing my learning experiences with students makes my purpose that much more meaningful to me! I did not become a teacher accidentally and I want my students to see the people who inspire me!

Never Eat Lunch Alone

We have a rotating schedule of who must be on lunch duty.  If we are not assigned duty we may eat in our classroom.  I intentionally sit with whoever is on lunch duty. I need time to clear my head.  I need time away from my classroom.  Eating lunch with others builds community.   This is especially important to me because I live alone.

Playing Music

As students work independently and enter my classroom I play instrumental Christian music. It creates a sense of calm for the students and me. I also hate awkward silence but, loose focus if students talk too loud.  It’s great volume control.  If I can’t hear the music the students have gotten too loud. Above all else, it helps me know that God is ALWAYS in my classroom no matter how stressed I am….   

Going to Chapel  

At the end of week our students spend an hour of their day in a worship service. Like lunch duty, teachers rotate Thursday chapel duty. I elect to attend chapel every week.  It gives me a chance to let go of all my frustrations and stress.  There are plenty of days I don’t feel worthy enough but I know God is beside me.   If I’m being honest, sometimes I’ve just been too exhausted for Sunday service. So knowing that we worship at school fills my heart.  Our services are sometimes guest speakers but, often are led by our science teacher who has studied youth ministry. He gives superhero sermons that I pray our students hear because each of them has moved me as believer!

Community Service   

I have always been a teacher at heart. Perhaps more importantly, I have always had a huge heart for giving and caring about others.  I don’t have too much time to volunteer often but this quarter I have invited students, friends, and family to collect teddy bears to comfort local children in need. I have done this to CELEBRATE my commitment to children and to celebrate the JOY of becoming a teacher! There’s a small collection of teddy bears in my classroom that remind me that I am not in this alone.   I am so thankful for each person who has supported me! It means everything to me!

As you wrap up the week try to focus on WHO YOU ARE! Someone needs you loves you & is thankful for you!

Joyfully, 

Teacher Julie 

Teachers Need Teachers!

Friends,

I created this blog three years ago because those around me promised that there was great strength in understanding that I was called to teach despite the struggles of cerebral palsy.  The blog gave me space to allow being a “teacher at heart” value.    In August my dream became a reality. I am a teacher!  It’s been a while since I’ve posted to the blog.  It turns out that living my dream doesn’t give me much time to write about it.

Next week marks the end of the first quarter.  It’s a time to reflect and celebrate.  Many times on this journey I’ve expressed that as someone who copes with cerebral palsy, it’s easy to feel as if the world is just moving around me.  This is the first time in life that my position hasn’t been deemed temporary.  There’s a true sense of relief in knowing that my job won’t end next week.  I cannot explain how much I cherish the opportunity to go to work each day. 

At the same time the opportunity has me pressuring myself to be perfect.  I’ve spent years reading about the art of excellent teaching and striving to be like the mentors and friends who assured me I was worthy enough to be called a teacher.  It took me about nine weeks to understand that perfect teaching doesn’t exist.   I’ve put my identity into being an outstanding teacher.   Last week I shared this thought with a fellow teacher who reminded me that being an outstanding teacher will just happen naturally. I should not expect this just yet.   

In every book on the art of teaching there’s at least one chapter devoted to reminding teachers that every student deserves someone who believes in them.   This is absolutely true but I believe there’s more. We often fail to remember that eventually students will become adults.  I firmly believe that adults also need people in our lives who remind us that we matter. We can't lift others if we aren't being uplifted. 

This has been an exciting transition but also has been very overwhelming at times.  I am extremely thankful to the people in my life who have been a constant source of encouragement.   You keep me moving! 

As I grow into teaching I hope that teachers and students alike  know how much I care about them.  After all, caring for others is what makes life worth living. 

Stay inspired,

Julie

 

A Balancing Act : Fear & Joy

This week I had the opportunity to have a conversation with a professor who is leading a diversity conference for K-12 teachers at her university.  As a teacher with cerebral palsy (CP) she invited me to share about how my school experiences as a student have impacted me personally and professionally.  Our conversation was an opportunity to reflect on the true significance of a seemingly ordinary experience.

Generally, I have always felt a responsibility to be a source of hope for others.  There’s no doubt about it, the challenges of cerebral palsy (CP) are real.  It’s definitely much easier to simply highlight joy than to confront the uncomfortable emotions.   There are very few who know about my fears and frustrations--- knowing those emotions means you’ve earned my trust.   It’s always been a personal rule; radiate as much joy as possible!  It doesn’t mean my struggles are less it just means I decided that people don’t need to know. 

So, when this professor asked me what going to school with CP felt like my response shocked me:  It was extremely emotional! I’ve always portrayed school as a joyful place and that’s not entirely true.  It’s a place where I learned to regulate my emotions. It could’ve been dodging the laughter or stares as I navigated the hallways.   It might’ve been struggling to stay ahead with AP History readings or math problems because of learning disabilities.  There was always a need to be brave.  If you are identifiably different you find yourself constantly fighting against it--- even if it’s not obvious to others.

In his book, The Courage to Teach Parker Palmer writes, “ The phrase be not afraid doesn’t say we should not have fears…. Instead, it says, we should not be our fears.”  The more I reflect on my journey the more powerful these words become.  As teachers students come to us with fear (or uncertainty) all the time.  I can’t promise that every student’s fear will disappear in my classroom.   Nonetheless, it’s become abundantly clear that so many teachers helped me turn fear  (or uncertainty) into joyful possibility. The people who were kind enough to walk through fear with me are the reason I have the opportunity to teach.

 The need to be brave might be a constant feeling for me but, at some point everyone will face it.   It is a privilege to help the world see that that fear doesn’t have to paralyze you; it can propel you….  Sometimes, you’ve just got to go for it!

Joyfully,

Teacher Julie

Waiting Well

Friends,

 It's been quite some time since I have posted to the blog.  There were many days as I ran toward my dream that I felt exhausted and discouraged.  I felt like I had nothing valuable to say, so I just stopped writing.  It’s funny, I’ve always known that it takes me just a little longer to accomplish my goals than most people, but I still don’t wait well.

In April I accepted my first full time teaching job for the upcoming school year.  I am so excited but the summer plans that I made in early spring have changed.  This means I have more free time than I expected.  I’m preparing for both major personal and professional stepping stones which means down time is really a gift.  However, it inspired me to write about waiting.

In the process I have tried my best to do two things: Pray and write words of gratitude.  For me prayer can consist of reading devotions, scripture, or just listening to my favorite contemporary Christian music.  Several years ago, I was introduced to the UrbanPromise ministry.  The founder of UrbanPromise, Dr. Bruce Main wrote a devotional titled: If Jesus Were a Senior: Last Minute preparations for Post college Life. One of my favorite devotions tells the story of a driver’s interaction with a tollbooth attendant while crossing the San Francisco- Oakland Bridge. In short, the driver crossed the bridge several times and each time he encountered this attendant he was always cheerful.  Sometimes, he even played music in his toll.  For me the take away of the devotion is to make the best of your circumstance. It’s an unforgettable story. 

Today on my morning walk all I could think was:  Why can’t I just be like the man in the tollbooth?!  

 As soon  as I got word that that I’d been given the opportunity to teach I was eager to share with the community of family friends, and mentors who have supported me along the way. The response of love and genuine care is still a feeling that overwhelms me.  Many acknowledged the accomplishment by telling me that they are so proud of me!  This phrase has taken on a profound new meaning for me.  Here’s how I determine the difference between happy and proud.  It’s simple to be happy for someone. You give them a hug or a high five when their goal is complete, but you weren’t part of the process. On the  other hand, when you’re proud of someone there’s a sense of commitment that you give to helping them achieve their goal. You offer words of encouragement, constructive advice, and comfort. You are there to listen when fear and failure take hold of their heart. Furthermore, when fear and failure try to win you acknowledge  that anger, sadness, or discontent is just fear rather than true representation of inner strength. The ability to recognize inner strength means that you have built  a relationship with someone. You have aimed to understand who they are and who they want to become.  This is to say that being proud of others takes true work!

Over the last month, I have understood that on the days when I felt discouraged a core group of people was always proud of my journey to teaching.    This is to say that those who are sincerely proud of you will always recognize you as the man in the tollbooth who is truly  trying  to  make the most of life.   It seems that waiting has taught me that pride and pleasure do not necessarily mean perfection. True pride comes from an intentional and continual process.  Be proud of others on purpose!

Joyfully, 

Teacher Julie